This article will consider factors preventing you from succeeding and how you can move ahead. At the end, youd have exercises to put the 5 tools for change taught here into practice.
We often blame external forces for hindering our progress or, rarely credit them for moving us forward. No wonder we hear people say: I grew up in a difficult neighbourhood, The economy is bad in my country, The governments policy is not to our advantage, Supernatural forces are retarding me.
But Ill rather like to look at internal forces that can actually move us forward or hold us back. Its only by controlling them that you can really exercise control over your present and future as the external forces are not really as strong as they are in our minds.
One of the internal forces is called Self-image. This is the picture you unconsciously hold in your mind about yourself. This image was formed by things repeatedly said about and to you by your parents, siblings, classmates and teachers; by things your friends, or co-workers now say about you; and by comparisons you make between yourself and others.
The self image limits our potentialities, our audacity, preventing us from trying things we think we arent gifted for. But are we really so limited?
No, for there is no such thing as, for example, a born leader or a born underling. These are acquired beliefs and learned behaviours, stereotypes. As we grow up, we are told what to do and what not to do, what to say and what not to say, what we can do and what we cannot do, etc. By and by we internalize these things and in consonance with the programming we unconsciously authorise certain things for ourselves and forbid ourselves others. We reproduce the stereotypes.
Now, are you being limited by your self-image? Then you have to set goals for your life. Setting goals will no doubt pitch you against your self-image limits. While you cant outperform your self-image, you can challenge it, push at its limits to achieve.
Learn to discover your hidden talents and new interests
When somebody says they cant swim, maybe its because the first time they learned to swim, there was an accident and they nearly drowned. So they developed aqua phobia. And then people close to them always told him to avoid water or risk drowning. So they naturally resist learning to swim. This goes for any other activity we think we cant do.
How the Nerd discovered his secret talent as a billiard shark
Once there was a math whiz that had great interest in computers, science, and technical topics but none at all in playing billiards. He will always give excuses when asked to play the game with his friends, not knowing that he was only doing the bidding of the picture in his head.
But when somebody gave him the similarity between billiard and geometry, the whiz began to take interest in the game and ended up beating his friends who were experts at it.
So, the only way to uncover your hidden talent and interests is to act. Instead of Im not good at it, Its not my cup of tea, Im not interested in it, rather say Ill give it a try. Who knows, you might find youre talented for it.
The way to strengthen skills or abilities
When developing especially a new skill or ability, you need some or all of these 5 ways top athletes and businesspeople employ to strengthen their skills:
Visualisation Affirmation Education Association Action
Visualization: Forming and holding mental images of yourself in a new positive role you wish for yourself is as effective as the limiting self-images. Its like playing a role in a movie or a theatrical piece. The more you immerse yourself in the new persona, the more you will personify that character.
Supposing your want to be an affiliate marketer. Picture yourself as one already. Play that role in your head as if you were doing it in a film.
Affirmation: You reinforce your new self by constantly reminding yourself about it and believing in it. This constant self-talk reinforces the image you hold of yourself because your mind receives it as a command and as such will work at making it a reality.
Lets return to your desire to be an affiliate marketer. Write down your affirmations and repeat them till you memorize them. Then repeat them to yourself the whole day, before you go to bed and first thing on waking up in the morning. The results will amaze you!
Visit the secret site if you want to know more about the two notions above.
Education or Information: The more you know about something, the easier it becomes for you. This is true of any skill you want to acquire or master: by learning more about it, your confidence level and your competence will automatically increase.
Association: If you want to be good or better at doing something, it makes sense to be around people who master it and from whom you can learn by imitation. Again, birds of a feather flock together.
Action: Unless you take action on what you learn, you would never amount to much. Action speaks louder than words, you remember?
Incidentally, this is where people abandon their dreams. Yet action is what gives form to your ideas or thoughts. Successful people immediately follow decision with action. They know that you only become what you DO and not what you THINK or SAY.
Just as we did in the earlier article, let us put the 5 tools for change into practice. Dont procrastinate, thats a sure way to remain in the past!
5 TOOLS FOR CHANGE
Again pick up other sheets of paper or go to your computer for this exercise. Write the headings on each page and let yourself go!
Describe as fully as you can a picture, or a mental image, of yourself doing something you want to do and doing it successfully. (E.g.: a successful day in a career youd want to embrace). Run this movie several times a day through your mind for as long as you havent achieved it. Picture yourself in the movie as if it was reality.
Create as many (but not too many) limit-lifting affirmations as you can comfortably memorize in conformity with the new directions youd like to take. Read or recite them to yourself several times a day, with as much conviction as if youd already achieved them.
E.g.: If your limiting self-image is fear of talking in front of a crowd, your positive affirmation could be: I am a great speaker and Im interested in imparting my ideas to others in a passionate manner. I have a lot to tell people about and people love to listen to me intently and avidly. So speaking to crowds becomes passionate for me.
List 3 things that you can do to achieve the education that you want
List 3 persons that you should associate with less in order to move unfettered in your positive directions
List 3 persons that you should associate with more to help you move in your new positive directions
5. ACTION Date……………………………………………
List actions you will take in the next 10 days to advance you in your new positive directions.
Action Tick here when done