Henry Ford said “If you think you can or you think you can’t – you’re right.” No matter who you are, no matter what you have or what you do there will be an area in your life that would benefit from improved confidence. Quite often those who appear to us to be the most in control people are the ones who are most racked with self doubt and insecurities. Now if you’re not a high achiever or you are and believe that you only got where you are by some kind of fluke there are ways to beat shyness or social phobia and to gain confidence quickly, easily and naturally.
I am going to share two quick changes any one can make in their lives. Implement these two actions alone and you will see tangible results very quickly. If you want to gain an insight into other pro active actions you can take to beat shyness, break free from social phobias and improve your confidence I will provide details of where you can get these from later.
First action, and by reading this you have already started it “Get Started Getting Confident.” It doesn’t matter how small that action is just do something. You have started that because clearly you have been looking for information to help you, so well done you, give yourself a pat on the back for starting to get started. It really can be as simple as looking up the phone number of the company you have always wanted to work for, or the phone number of the person you have always wanted to ask out for a cup of coffee. That’s it, one step at a time. OK I can hear you “how on earth are such little steps going to make any difference”. The fact is the most difficult part of any change is getting started; it really is powerful when we start to take action. The fact is when we look up that phone number the sense of relief that we experience is usually enough to carry us on to the next action to exceed our expectation, after all we only expected to look up the number not to actually call it. But if we phone or not is not the point the point is we did what we told ourselves we would. Start by making a short list of actions you want to take then brake each one of them down into smaller steps. Then one step at a time.
Second Action. “Can you feel the Energy.” I am sure you have all heard of Tony Robbins he does an exercise and you can do this to stand in front of a mirror and watch your reflection. Tony asks that you remember a time when you were feeling really happy and in control of your life. Whilst imagining this time watch your reflection, see the way you hold yourself, your expression any tension in your posture. Whilst doing this talk to yourself saying things like “I’m so happy, life is excellent”, OK you can say this in your head if it makes it easier, that’s how I do it. Now imagine a time when your life has felt depressing and your feel powerless and deskilled. Again watch your facial and body language. What happens to your posture, has your face shape changed.
Again have the internal commentary “I’m hopeless, no one would ever love me”. The fact is but if we behave like we are depressed and down we will become that way but likewise if we behave like we are up beat and happy again that’s how we will become. It is possible to trick our brains into thinking we are happy just by behaving as if we are, do this along with the internal dialogue, “I am so happy, my life is excellent, that person is so lucky to be with me” and your mood will change. Look I know it sounds like rubbish but give it ago and I can guarantee it will make a noticeable change, change your body language and your feelings and thinking will follow.